Why are we so afraid of the stillness? Perhaps when I write this I write from my heart. For many, they welcome the quiet. If you’ve lived a day in Bangkok it isn’t rare to want to hide yourself in the confines of somewhere silent, somewhere away from people, even if just for a minute. I’m not sure I fit into this category. Living life at 100miles an hour is all I know. I’m nearly sure that I entered this world fast and ever since then I’ve not stopped running! God gave us 24 hours in which to tackle the tasks set before us. Bring it on, my moto has always been to squeeze every second out of the day. Starting a life in Bangkok has the potential to heighten this part of my personality. There is always space to go a little faster, speak a little louder, NEVER STOP! But eventually there comes a point, a point where the body I try so hard to control and push screams” enough!” , my spirit whispers quietly that it just needs a minute, a minute to grasp my thoughts, to wrestle with this task known as rest.
What a funny term, rest, this means different things to different people for me my idea of rest it to throw a few heavy barbells around, do the shopping, write a book, go for a meal, see friends, carry out my work. I’m almost certain that my life style exhausts the people around me, let alone myself.
The thing about squeezing every inch of time out of our lives is the fact that we forget that doing this a relationship is jeopardised. A relationship so important that without it I wouldn’t be here. Why would I willingly choose to give this up? My creator is longing to spend some time with me, he’s longing to reveal his hopes and his dreams, he’s longing to heal the pain, he’s longing to fill me up and show what deep, beautiful joy is and yet I have refused to push the stop bottom. Why can the quiet be so deafening?
Now it’s time to strengthen that relationship and guess what, since I’ve been making time for a connection with my God, it’s been somewhat life changing. A broken heart is being healed and his plans are being revealed to me in ways I couldn’t begin to imagine! God will keep pursuing us until we finally break away from our schedule and sit at his feet just to get a glimpse of him.
I want to emphasize this with a beautiful poem I read in my most recently read book “A Mary heart in a Martha world” Joanna Weaver
The Lord is my pace setter
The Lord is my pace setter….I shall not rush,
He makes me stop for quiet intervals
He provides me with images of stillness which restore my serenity
He leads me in the way of efficiency through calmness of mind and his guidance is peace
Even though I have a great many things to accomplish each day, I will not fret for his presence is here,
His timelessness, his all importance will keep me in balance
He prepares refreshment and renewal in the midst of activity by anointing my mind with his oils of tranquillity,
My cup of joyous energy overflows,
Truly harmony and effectiveness shall be fruits of my hours for I shall walk in the pace of my lord and dwell in his house forever.”
This poem strikes me every time I read it, God is the pace setter, we need only be still and he will fight for us, rest and silence is where he meets us, it’s time to feel that love more than ever.
Bangkok is overflowing with God’s love at the moment, as some of you may have seen via my Facebook posts, many women are being set free from the destruction of slavery. Many women are seeking the aid of Nightlight and we are sending them home back far away from the sex trade and to be reunited with their families. So many women are seeking aid, it makes my heart want to burst. The majority of the women in the care of Nightlight have been trafficked from Africa and Uzbekistan I want to say this now, I ask that you continue to pray because no matter how big this trade these women are being set free one by one! Thank you so much for your love and support, the movement that is happening at the moment is beautiful.
I just want to finish with a reflection on the hearts of the women we work with. Entering into the sex trade requires a woman to become the world’s best actress. Nothing is what it seems and desperation or trafficking is behind the smiles. I have been reading a book named “Miss Bangkok, the memoirs of a Thai prostitute” and I please ask that this be dwelled upon “The Farangs who frequent this red-light district claim that it is like a utopian parallel universe, whereas the prostitutes who work here see it as their own personal hell. Despair, betrayal, secrecy and abuse lurk around every corner for us.”
This industry strips away dignity, it destroys souls, but I tell you this, the women that go through this hell day in day out are some of the bravest most courageous women I have ever met. This fight will go on until every woman knows her worth and knows where her identity lies.
I am feeling incredibly loved and encouraged by people from a
ll over the world so I thankyou for your love and little emails of support. The church partners who have been linked to me Via BMS are so incredibly kind and are continuously writing to me to let me know I am being held up in prayer. God doesn’t call us half way across the world to leave us alone. He puts prayer warriors around us to keep us going even on the days when our spirits feel crushed. To all who have kept me going through this time. I love you and I thankyou